Jam on down to the blog where you’ll find everything that rocks and a few things that roll. Everything from 1963 – 1975 fits in the blog that covers any amp that’s ever roared. Other than that we have some sub-pages to cover the kangaroos from down under that kepts rocking for a few years and never left much room for Silver Chair or new wave rock to really fill the enormous school boy shoes. The things that really rock these days are a lot more tame like small business growth and investment opportunities. No longer can you rage from dusk till dusk without a drop of water – you’ve got to look out for local deals in spinal wellness and financial stability. Orange County is a pretty gnarly place if you are comfortable being fiscally responsible and patient waiting for the right real estate agent to show your home. These things are part of growing up in a competitive market, however aging rockers will never let something cover their amp. They’ll turn the new life leaf over and smash a double fat strat on the stupid leaf.
Welcome back to the blog, folks! It feels like it’s been quite a while since I managed to get enough time to post something here, but some recent events with the family spurned me into a contemplative, writing-sort of mood.
I’ve been having some pretty significant family issues recently that involved the visitation hours and custody rights allotted to me with my kids. I know this subject has been done to death with things like VH1’s Behind The Music and pretty much every biography done on the great stars of popular music since the 50’s, but this is important to me, and you are my reader, not theirs!
Years of reflection have made me recognize that the underlying issues that were the root of my family problems started in high school. A late bloomer and rather nebbish for my first years of serious interactions with women, I did not have a proper ‘girlfriend’ until well into my 20’s when my music was starting to take off.
This late start, with its corresponding years of anguish over unrequited love and watching friends, enemies, and everyone else either shack up with a girl or tear through them lead to a lot of odd ideas about what love looked like and what was proper in relationships. It also lead to a significant amount of resentment towards the fairer sex that was not fair or correct, and this in large part bled into my relationship with the woman who I eventually married, had children with, and subsequently divorced after a number of immature and, frankly, stupid mistakes.
Despite loving my ex wife and being absolutely enamored with my children, the voice at the back of my head always called for me to seek new things, new experiences to ‘make up for lost time’. Well, that would come back to bite me, as I have spent years looking to make up for the time lost with my children thanks to the divorce.
After a long time of resentments bubbling over and competing ideas about how to raise them, my kids have recently begun requesting that they be allowed to stay with me more often, and my ex wife’s stance on the subject has began to soften. My kids want primary custody to be switched over to me, but however much her stance has shifted, that would be a little much for her.
So, we once again have begun the arduous process of working with the family court system to determine a more fair and equitable system of sharing the kids that would leave her, the kids, and I in a better position where everyone can be…if not satisfied, then something closer to it.
For this newest round of court drama, I of course contacted my friends over at Shuff Law, one of the finest family law firms in Santa Ana and all of southern California. They gave a great rundown of everything I’d need to do and have prepared by the court date.
Hopefully, this new state of affairs will let me make up for the time I’ve lost with my children as they’ve grown up, as I can’t stand to think of what life would be like without them. If you’re like me, and need the expert help of the premier family law attorneys in southern California, give the Shuffs a call: you may get the same second chance at a life with your kids that I’m getting now.
Shuff Law Firm
2107 North Broadway Ste 301, Santa Ana, CA 92706
If there is one thing I have been missing recently, it is the feel of a guitar and the beautiful music that comes from it once I am in the zone and in my flow. I recently realized that I wanted to tap into that feeling again, so I decided to renovate my office into a music recording studio to spend more time doing what I love. I may have retired from the rock and roll lifestyle and business, but I very much enjoy going into the studio to jam.
However, as we got into the demolition, I discovered something that horrified me. It had turned out that my office had been infested with termites.
If you have followed me for some time, you know that this wasn’t my first rodeo. As soon as I realized what was going on, I immediately called a termite inspector and exterminator to resolve the issue. It wasn’t an easy situation to resolve. For those who are dealing with the same issue, I thought I would share my experience with the termite inspection and removal process.
What You Need To Know About Termite Inspection And Treatment
A termite inspection will take place before the termite treatment, in order to assess the extent of the infestation and decide the best course of action. Now, this may vary among termite experts, but I was told to prep before my appointment by clearing out all items from the area so that inspection could be properly done without obstruction.
During the inspection, they looked at both the exterior and the interior and noticed a few red flags, including discarded wings and mud tubes. I hired a company in Pasadena for my termite treatment. You will need to ensure that when the inspector comes, they will have access to all the areas of the house. With the size of my property, it took them forty-five minutes to inspect. Your inspection may take more or less time, depending on your house.
There are various ways to deal with termites.
This is an extreme measure, however, it needs to be taken when one has colonies of termites within and surrounding their house. This is done by installing bait stations throughout the space. The baits are then monitored to detect future termite infestations as they enter into your house.
This is usually done when the house is infested with subterranean termites. A trench is dug around the foundation of the house and the soil is treated with a substance that kills termites. The trench is then filled, and the insecticide remains in the soil to effectively kill all termites.
There are many types of termite treatments for wood, however, foams are especially useful for areas that are difficult to reach. Termite treatment foams can be used indoors and outdoors.
If you also have an infestation and are looking for termite treatment, then you should prepare yourself—be armed and ready with information and expertise. You can give Grand Oaks Termite Control a call today for consultation and inspection.
Grand Oaks Termite Control
110 S Worthy Dr, Glendora, CA 91741
I had a long jam session last night, so this article is a guest post by our neighborhood dog walker. Enjoy!
Every dog-owner will agree that their pets are an integral part of their families and that they cannot imagine their lives without them. These animals are so adorable and affectionate, that their wellbeing becomes such a priority that cannot be compromised at any cost. Needless to say, a pet dog has nobody else to rely on apart from its owner to take care of its health. A balanced diet, regular grooming and exercise, and routine checkups at the veterinarian are necessary to ensure that your dog’s physical and mental health is taken care of.
Keeping your dog’s heart healthy can make your heart healthy too. According to a study titled Circulation: Cardiovascular Quality and Outcomes, owning a dog is linked to better human well-being and longevity. That said, if you notice that your dog is suddenly having difficulty breathing or experiencing fatigue, they may have a heart problem. You should schedule an appointment immediately with a Cardiac Veterinarian.
Furthermore, it is very important for you to carefully analyze your doggy best friend’s habits in terms of their activities, such as play, eating, drinking, and sleeping. Variations in these patterns are the clearest sign that their health may be in questionable condition.
Record their weight
A dog’s weight, much like a human being, is dependent on a balance between nutrition and physical activity. For instance, if your dog has been fed nutritious meals and is yet underweight or overweight, then you wouldn’t be entirely wrong to suspect that they might be struggling with health issues. Overfeeding a dog to keep him strong and healthy is a common mistake, as obese dogs are more vulnerable to developing serious health issues. According to experts, the best way to tell whether or not you are feeding your dog more than you should is by feeling the area around its rib cage. If you can feel their ribs under their skin without much padding, then they are likely in good shape.
Wash your dog regularly
There is no better feeling than petting the soft coat of your dog after a long, hard day. That said, you should check your dog’s skin frequently, as it can explain a lot about their health. Common causes for concern include scabs, white flakes, and red patches. As an owner, you should check your dog’s skin for fleas, lice, ticks, and any other such external pests that are capable of wreaking havoc. Spotted early, it can be controlled before it is too late. If there is a spot that looks like black dirt clumping their coat against their skin, it could be flea droppings. Therefore, in order to steer away from the possibility of your dog developing any such condition, they should be washed often.
Schedule routine veterinarian appointments
Vaccinations can prevent the dog from contracting serious illnesses that might be irrevocable or even fatal. Getting your dog shielded from ailments like hepatitis and rabies through vaccination will give you peace of mind, sparing you of the headache that comes with constantly worrying about their health.
This story comes as I was taking a hot tub soak in my San Diego abode overlooking the sea, deep in contemplation over the many scars I’ve accrued over the years. Not from any fights, mind you, or any feats of valor, but from the incredibly dumb escapades I’ve had with my good friend ‘Al’ (cohol). Hands wrecked from punching through walls, TV screens, and windows, burns from late night belligerent cooking, and all manner of scrapes and slashes from falling from various heights.
Then my eyes landed on one set of criss-crossing scars I got from before my music career took off – the one from the accident I had as a young kid just out of high school. The one that almost ended my music career before it got off the ground.
There isn’t some great story behind it – some moron who was drunk at noon decided to do some donuts in a cul-de-sac as I was passing by. Once a neighbor yelled about calling the cops, he burned rubber in an escape attempt, losing control and clipping me in the process. I was sent flying, my leg now bent in a direction it was very much not supposed to be in.
I landed, dazed, and remember only the sounds of yelling before waking back up in a hospital the next day. My knee was absolutely shredded, the bones broken and the ligaments torn to the point that they didn’t know if I was going to ever be able to walk without a crutch.
I decided that this was not an acceptable state of affairs, so I began many months of grueling rehabilitation and physical therapy, all at my and my family’s expense. The guy in the truck was thrown in the can for reckless endangerment, but walked away no worse for wear, while I was stuck on my butt for the better part of a year.
Lucky for me I had my music to keep me comfortable, but my family was in dire straights for a long time while I was getting back on my feet. If we had access to a good personal injury lawyer at the time way out in our corner of nowhere, we’d have avoided a lot of heartache.
So, while ruminating on all of this, I decided I’d help my local San Diego readers find an auto accident attorney if they find themselves in a similar situation. A local guy who comes very highly recommended by some friends is Chris Villasenor and his office, Villasenor Law offices.
There’s a ton to like from what I’ve heard about the firm. Patient, conscientious, and highly communicative, they have everything you want in a PI lawyer. Checking out their Yelp page, Jonathon S. testifies to this in writing:
Great attorney in all respects. Chris and his staff are very helpful and communicative, contributing to a fluid experience from the onset. Moreover, with his expertise and thoroughness, Chris was able to secure an excellent resolution for my personal injury case. I highly recommend his services.
Villasenor’s offices also do a bang-up job with contract law. A peek at their Google reviews has a number of good things to say about their work in the field:
“Over the last 10 years, Chris Villasenor has created several contracts for my company that protect me in case a dispute with a client or contractor crops up. He has also reviewed contracts from my potential clients or partners and made recommendations on ways they needed to be revised in order to protect my best interest. Chris was also very helpful and informative when my husband & I were faced with a real estate dispute while purchasing our current home. Chris is trustworthy, professional and a great legal resource in times of need AND he’s become my attorney of choice!”
So, if you’re in the Mira Mesa, Poway, or the greater San Diego area and need a personal injury lawyer or business attorney, these are your guys. Don’t get stuck with a bill that might crush your dreams and do the smart thing – sue the pants off the guy who had the temerity to crash into you.
Villasenor Law Offices
12396 World Trade Dr Ste 211, San Diego, CA 92128
Through my years as a wannabe and then fully fledged rock star, I’ve attended a number of disastrous parties. Things getting thrown out windows, hit with blunt objects, and not a few buildings getting burnt to the ground in some particularly boisterous affairs. If I’m being honest, the disastrous parties were often times the ones that were the most fun, though my lawyer would probably advise against me saying so.
While I was mostly partied out by the time my time in the limelight came to an end, that wasn’t the end of the parties. Not only did my band mates continue their youthful shenanigans, I had some rather unwanted guests in a number of the properties I had bought over the years stage some parties of their own.
Who are these uninvited guests, you ask? Not hippies, not grungy punks, not even star-sucking sycophants looking to lap up any crumbs of clout they could steal from my plate. These guests were of an even more invasive species I’ve had to deal with.
Termites! The little critters invaded not one, not two, but three of my residences and establishments over the years, including my favorite home in southern California. This presented a pretty big problem for me, as at the time I was going through a bit of a health kick and believed most pesticides were basically evil.
One major thing I wish we had at the time was an environmentally- and health-conscious movement in society at large and pest control in particular, like we do now. As it stands, when it comes to natural removal of termites and other creepy-crawlies for my Southern California enterprises, I always call the same guys: Natural Science Exterminating.
The Garden Grove-based company prides itself on its use of natural remedies to not only remove pests once they’ve infested a building through tenting and spot removal, but also preventing infestations from occurring in the first place. They use a number of naturally derived and plant-based chemicals that the plants use to ward off pests themselves to give your home a reprieve from damaging insects, so you don’t have to worry about your pets getting poisoned or gigantic swarms of bugs coming crashing through your roof as you sleep.
When my homes were host to such unwelcome house parties, I had to just clench my teeth and allow the smelly exterminator to tent them up for a week. Once they took the tent off, I couldn’t go into the houses without my skin crawling from the thought of all the chemicals that were pumped into the walls and how every time I touched something I was now doomed to a painful cancerous death.
You don’t have to go through the mental torture I put myself through (I am a bit of a hypochondriac, admittedly, so you might not do it regardless). Natural Science Exterminating offers free termite inspections in Garden Grove and its surrounding areas, so if you’re like me and can’t stand the thought of every chemical monstrosity known to man being sprayed all over your possessions, give them a call.
Natural Science Exterminating
11642 Knott Ave, Garden Grove, CA 92841
Have you ever looked at your life and wanted to start over?
Because…I have. Like most artists, I am never quite satisfied with reality as it is. I have always believed in the possibilities of creating something new, impactful, and amazing. I believe that this creative drive is innate within every artist. Sometimes it leads me into chaos, like not sleeping for 3 days in a row, and other times, it leads to a masterpiece—like my second critically acclaimed studio album. There is no way to predict where your ideas will lead you.
I believe that life is far too short for it to stay the same for too long. We are, after all, human, and that means our tastes and preferences change over time. Some of us will come to despise what we once loved, or we will come to find that that which we once could not get enough of, is now boring. In these cases, I don’t think of it an inconvenience to change things up and get to work—I see it as an opportunity. Tearing down the old and familiar can be messy, yet exhilarating.
I’ve been wanting to remodel our house for the past year. The architecture and style of my home had been largely influenced by my grunge rock days. I was into that. It’d be typical for me to wake up in the evening and not be able to tell if it was morning or evening. The house had a bit of a dark, mysterious feel to it, no matter the time of day.
But I started thinking that maybe I wasn’t getting the most out of life, living this way. I thought about moving to a new home, but I simply love Orange County too much. That’s when I thought about renovating my home, transforming it into a brighter and more open space.
I knew I needed to find the best team of designers, painters, carpenters, and architects. I googled “home remodeling orange county” and was delighted to find Inspired Remodels, a design and build contractor! I checked out their website and discovered that they can do it all: bathrooms, kitchens, full interiors, and custom carpentry. I knew I had to give them a call to see if they could take on the remodel I had in mind.
Sure enough, they assured me that my project could be completed by their team “from floor to ceiling.” That was relieving. I certainly wanted to have no part in the process; if it were left to me, I’d create a disaster. I will always just stick to making music, not renovating homes. I also looked up their reviews on Yelp—and they are fantastic. Moreover, their online portfolio had exactly what I was looking for.
The renovations were complete a few weeks ago, and I couldn’t be happier with my new home. I find myself waking up a lot earlier. Hello, productivity!
If you have an idea for your home renovation, you can give them a call.
21098 Bake Pkwy Suite 102, Lake Forest, CA 92630, United States
Hey guys! Just stopping by for a quick post today because I’m shoving off for yet another sailing adventure. I’ve almost perfected my sailing skills to the point that I can take the thing out of the marina, but we’re taking it one day at a time.
Today, I was ruminating on how much my life has changed since the divorce, and how incredible the family law attorneys I used were to leave me with as much of my shirt on as they did, considering the water-tight case my wife had when we separated. The firm (Shuff Law Firm) comes with two thumbs up from me.
Since I’m running short on time today, I’ll let some other clients of their speak their piece about them:
Shuff Law Firm was recommended to me by a dear friend and I highly recommend them to you!
Joe, Tamara and their entire team work with the utmost professionalism coupled with a genuine care for their clients needs. This Father- Daughter team brings many many years of experience to the table! They’ll represent you with integrity, honesty, and a great energy, yet will not be steamrollered by opposing counsel.
Most recently, Tamara held my hand during an incredibly tough situation while believing in me and the justice to prevail. Her kind heart keeps her honest and her experience keeps her strong!
I can’t recommend Shuff Law Firm enough!
My highest respect and regards for this law firm, in which I am extremely thankful for the level of professional care, support, advice and representation I received during a most difficult divorce. Tamara is the first lawyer that actually understood the complexity of my situation AND took action. Her support staff were caring and timely. I highly recommend this law firm to all my friends and anyone who is need of understanding and intelligent help. I am forever grateful
Finally, Jeff H., the guy who convinced me to use the firm:
If you want results? This is the firm and people that will get your Family/Divorce situation/case solved effectively, efficiently, and the best. I used 2 other lawyers prior to coming to Tamara and her father and they completed what I needed to be done in a short period of time and without the BS associated with family courts. Could I have been lucky with my situation? Maybe – BUT what I have learned in business is over communication, being straight forward (hearing the GOOD and the BAD), and relentless (like TAMARA was and is) is the best medicine to quell the sickness of this not so fun process of divorce. I would AND have recommended this firm to EVERYONE on the planet. Seriously the best people in the business and I would be more than happy to give you a personalized reference about how ecstatic I am that I was referred and used Shuff Law Firm to CLOSE my case swiftly. Thank you Tamara for everything you did for me and my family – words cannot express to you how impressed and overly satisfied i am with all you did. I know you will do the EXACT same for all of your clients in the future! JEFF
Quite a mouthful, Jeff, but he certainly gets the point across. Regardless, if you are in Orange County, I would most certainly recommend the Shuff divorce attorneys, based in Santa Ana.
You can find them here:
Shuff Law Firm
2107 North Broadway. Ste 301. Santa Ana, CA 92706
As I travelled the world as a young man, the one thing that always really got to me was the feeling that America was…lacking something that almost every other country had. A rock-solid connection to a shared history, perhaps you could call it.
In other words, a culture! Hah!
It’s a pretty common observation, I know, but whenever you’d walk out into a city like Budapest or Prague, you could see thousands of years of history built straight into the very essence of the town around you. With each block came structures that were built hundreds of years ago by people who knew that they’d never get to use them, but knew that future generations would.
There’s something to that concept that got lost in translation as people packed their bags and moved here. It may be because we got all the poor buggers of Europe moving over here in the early days whose idea of adequate shelter is a thatched roof on a pile of rotten logs, but whatever the case may be, I feel we got short-shifted in the exchange. Their houses and the landscaping surrounding their dwellings captured a feeling, a spirit, a people! Ours are…pragmatic. The frontier spirit, I guess.
Since our first tours out to Europe and then my own personal travels to places like North Africa, India, China, Southeast Asia, and Japan, I’ve been determined to grab a little of that time-transcendent energy and put it into a home that my family can use for generations to come. If you’ve read this blog for any length of time, you know the family aspect of my life can definitely use some work, but I do believe I have the house and its landscaping worked out perfectly.
The perfect generational house has to have the permanent, opulent yard to match, and for that I found an incredible company to help me get my plans worked out just to my liking, Torrey Pines Landscaping in La Jolla. Those guys have made some genuinely incredible landscapes over the years, and they’ve helped me on more than one occasion work up some landscaping plans that would be fit for a minor Asiatic prince, harem and all.
For the real major jobs, the company provides a full CAD (computer aided design) mockup of what the yard is going to look like, and as changes are made or requested, you get real time updates on how those changes are going to affect your landscaping without the need to just visualize it in your head. This leads to you being less stressed during construction and makes it way easier for everyone since you’re way more likely to fall in love with the design instead of making last minute adjustments.
So, if you’re looking to reclaim a little of that Old World spirit in your abode to pass on to future generations through some landscaping in your La Jolla home, I can’t recommend Torrey Pines Landscaping enough.
Torrey Pines Landscaping Company
5560 Eastgate Mall, San Diego, CA 92121
I would like to speak about something near and dear to my heart to hopefully inspire all of you dreamers out there. I guess this will probably sound a bit more serious than usual, but here we go…
Who was the first person to give you one big chance at making your dreams come to life? For me, it was an executive in Los Angelos who gave me my first record deal. I was a young kid with no money and sky-high dreams. If it weren’t for that record deal, I probably would have ended up homeless in LA or back on my mom’s couch in Minnesota.
Every artist dreams of their lucky break. But for many of us who were born in the United States, we tend to take the American dream for granted. Success stories like Kenyan musician J.S. Ondara remind us of the transformative impact immigration has on the lives of artists around the world. In 2013, Ondara received his United States green card, and today his album “Tales of America (The Second Coming)” has been nominated to receive a Grammy Award.
Stories like Ondara’s remind us to persevere no matter our circumstances, and to appreciate how lucky we are to live in the United States. Moreover, my point is this: no matter how hard it seems for you to create your art, you must push yourself to do it anyway. You should unleash your creativity against all odds, because every day is an opportunity to make something beautiful even if it seems unlikely to make it big. You never know how many people are working harder than you while having fewer opportunities and resources. I truly believe that each one of us got to where we are today because someone decided to give us a chance. That person saw something in you that reminded them of themselves, and it was your determination and drive that convinced them to take a bet on you. And it’s up to you to pass on the good deed.
While on tour in Portugal, I met with an up-and-coming band out of Lisbon. They opened for one of our shows, and I was very impressed with their talent. After the show, their lead guitarist Adriano stopped by backstage for some advice on immigrating to the United States. I was caught off guard and I didn’t have all of the answers. I promised Adriano I would ask a lawyer in the United States and get back to him with answers.
Having dealt with a previous issue with my bandmate George (he almost got deported back to Canada), I reached out to the best immigration lawyer I knew of based in Orange County, Kiran Nair of K Nair Law Group. I knew that I could trust her expertise. Ms. Nair has represented cases in Los Angeles and San Diego, in front of the California Superior and Immigration Courts.
The next day, I met with Adriano and his band at one of Lisbon’s best coffee shops and shared some good news: I would fund their legal expenses to immigrate to the United States, and I knew exactly who to refer them as their immigration lawyer.
Keep on dreaming and never give up! And if you need an immigration lawyer, I recommend you give Ms. Nair a call.
K Nair Law Group, P.C.
31897 Del Obispo St #225, San Juan Capistrano, CA 92675, United States
I know that this sounds crazy, but I promise you that I am speaking the truth: my daughter asks me, not her mom, for makeup advice. Back in my rock and roll days, our band was too broke to hire professional make up artists for our performances. So I picked up a brush, taught myself how to use it, and somehow, I became quite the Picasso on my own face. Back then, the popular “look” was heavy eyeliner and black eyeshadow, so that’s what we wore. My band also had its own signature: red, orange, and yellow flames painted on with face paint. Don’t ask us how we came up with that.
Last month, I was jamming away in my studio when my daughter walked in looking VERY upset. Was she upset because I sounded terrible? I sure don’t sound as good as I did was younger, but I can’t imagine sounding so bad to the point of making my daughter cry.
“Dad, I need to talk to you,” she said. Uh oh – I’m pretty sure no father wants to hear their daughter start off a conversation like this. You never know what to expect.
“I hate my eyebrows.”
Phew. I was relieved to hear that this wasn’t one of those conversations.
Before I could ask her “What do you mean?” she broke down in tears. “I hate my eyebrows! One is too thick and the other is too thin! I spend so much time obsessing about them!”
Oh my. Now I know I had mentioned that I was somewhat of a makeup expert back in the day, but that was only with eyeliner, eyeshadow, and face paint. I knew nothing about eyebrows, so I was at a loss for words.
Later that night, I went online to see what could be done about my daughter’s eyebrow catastrophe. As it turns out, eyebrows are an extremely important feature of the face, and many women are dissatisfied with the shape of their natural brows. I came across a solution that combines technology with permanent makeup to give people the perfect eyebrows: microblading.
Microblading is a form of permanent makeup. The client’s face is mapped out, and a new set of brows is traced on accordingly. Then, the technician uses a fine blade to tattoo highly realistic brow hairs, creating the ideal shape.
I came across a permanent makeup service that offers microblading in San Clemente. My daughter was skeptical at first when I told her about the service, but when I showed her the pictures, she was instantly floored and asked if we could book her an appointment the very next day. She became even more excited when she found out that the owner used to be an interior designer and understood the importance of symmetry.
Once microblading is done, the eyebrows required a few weeks to heal and for the ink to fully set in. My daughter now has a new set of stunning eyebrows, and as usual, I helped her solve yet another makeup problem!
Lift Permanent Makeup
24452 Del Prado Ave #A, Dana Point, CA 92629, United States
One addiction I got into while on tour (don’t worry about the many others) was an obsession with gambling. Every night in the bus we’d get a poker game going with the boys in the band and the roadies, with the driver and security joining in once we reached the hotel for the night. I can still remember the thrill of victory during a night drive from San Francisco to Tucson as I finally took the pot, only to realize a split second later that we had played up until we were a half hour away from the venue and I hadn’t slept in 32 hours.
That night’s show was frantic, to say the least.
As my other addictions were, ahem, taken care of over the years and I got older, the desire to gamble has always stayed with me, lurking beneath the shadows, ready to raise its pernicious head whenever the opportunity presented itself. Instead of kicking it with more yoga like everything else, however, I realized I could use this particular impulse for some constructive use in my post-retirement life.
That constructive use? Buying businesses for cheap, turning them around, and then selling them again for a healthy profit. Don’t worry, I’m not one of those skeevy dudes who buys otherwise healthy businesses, guts them to improve accounting profits then sells them to a competitor. I’m way too vain to not leave the company way better than when I found it.
That being said, even at a discount, a lot of these businesses don’t come cheap, and every single one of them is a major gamble I take with what income I get from the residuals from my touring days. The thrill of making the purchase, seeing what mess I’ve brought upon myself, and laying out a plan to turn the company around scratches the same itch I get from playing the tables at Morongo or Caesar’s. I just have the added benefit of really helping some of the employees I inherit.
There is one risk I never, ever take when buying one of these enterprises, however – not buying business insurance. I have very little stomach for lawyers, and even less for the litigious morons our society seems to spit out at an ever-increasing rate, so ensuring every company I take on is one of the primary first steps I take once I’m in control.
During a search for insurance providers for my most recent acquisition, I came into contact with a local star who really put the other agents I’ve worked with to shame with his attentiveness and solid workmanlike spirit – Byron Galindo. His Venice Beach-based insurance firm knocked it out of the park during our initial discussions about the nature of the business and how they could serve our specific needs.
As a natural gambler, if there’s any risk I would advise any young man never to entertain, its going through life without some insurance where you can get it. So much of life is random happenstance, and if you voluntarily invite greater risk than normal, its best to have a way to mitigate it at least on some fronts.
For that, I recommend insurance. If you’re in the Venice Beach area, I’d further recommend looking into Galindo Insurance.
Byron Galindo Insurance
214 Pier Avenue Santa Monica, CA 90405-5423
I think one of the reasons for my success as a creative force has been to some inherent restlessness in my soul, the ever-present desire for new experiences and novelty. I know for a fact this is why I’ve had so many ex-wives, ex-girlfriends, and ex-everythings. I get restless and bored without some new interest driving me to learn or experience something totally foreign to me.
So, I recently read a wild book about a guy in the mid-1800s who decided to ditch his studies and head out on a ship to experience the life of a sailor (Two Years Before the Mast, great read, totally recommend), and it got me thinking – hey, the ocean is this crazy, mercurial thing that can’t be tamed. I’m a crazy, mercurial thing that can’t be tamed. There’s probably a sort of kinship I can form with this thing.
Long story short, I’ve decided to take up sailing. As I age and I watch the other guys around me descend into drinking and golfing, in that order, I figure at least the unpredictability of life on the waves will keep my wits sharp and my liver semi-functional.
Once I set my mind on picking up the art of sailing, all that was left was to relocate to a new house that would complete this impulsive pursuit and make it easy to get from boat to home. I’ve travelled around the world and lived all over, and one place I’ve wanted to come back to is the beach cities in Orange County – there’s not a more beautiful place in the world with more gorgeous divorcees per square foot.
Also, there’s some great marinas.
With real estate in the county looking as erratic as it is, I decided to just dive in and go for it. My penchant for custom housing is well documented in this blog; what I like in the look of my home changes about as often as my hobbies. So, as I searched up and down the OC coast, Balboa immediately stuck out with its amazing beachfront and the variety in how people designed their properties over the years.
As I walked down the road, one particular custom home on Balboa Peninsula in Newport Beach caught my attention. The things I look for in a house can be boiled down to: if it fits my lifestyle, if the location is right, and if it has character. This house checked all my boxes: a breezy beachy character with a ton of open space for bringing the boys back after a hard day on the open water or a yacht club party with plenty of modern accoutrements that say, “yes, I am a wealthy person who owns a boat.”
The house was constructed by Sailhouse Construction, a native Newport Beach company that has been building incredible homes that are peppered all over the peninsula and the larger Newport Beach area. The name alone was enough to convince me that it’s probably fated for me to own one of their properties, so we’re already in the process of trying to close a deal.
Images of myself with a captain’s hat, a big blue peacoat and a corncob pipe stuck in my bearded face staring steely at a rough sea are already playing in my head, so you can imagine how excited I am to get moved in and start on the next adventure. I’m also pretty excited not to be living in the boat I bought last week that’s languishing in the Balboa Marina, which in hindsight may have been jumping the gun a bit.
If you’ve looked at these photos and said, ‘Man, I want to look into some of these shiny digs’, give the construction company a look. They’ve done some pretty incredible work.
170 Newport Center Dr Suite 220, Newport Beach, CA 92660
I’ll never be part of the crowd, because I was born to rock on stage. I live a bizarre life, and that’s my choice. But what is really bizarre are the coincidences that life seems to throw at me. What can I say? I guess some of us are simply chosen by the universe to play along.
After my last two termite infestations caused my stage to collapse both times while my band I were performing, I decided that the universe was sending me a sign. I have always known my life purpose to be to inspire people with music, but as I get older, I can’t help but think that the universe wants me to do something greater. After my second stage disaster, I knew that the divine was telling me something.
I figured that this was some type of mystical executive order, that I needed to tell everyone I knew about how my termite problem almost killed us on stage. Made sense to me. After all, what would be the point of live performances if we all ended up dead or injured on a broken stage? I kept having nightmares about this happening again. I couldn’t bear the thought of it happening to anyone else.
Last week, I sat down in my studio and pulled out my phone. I called each of my bandmates and said “Listen, I know this sounds crazy, but I can’t stop thinking about those times when the stage broke while we were performing live. When was the last time you had a termite inspection? I know this sounds paranoid, but I’m calling everyone I know to warn them about the dangers of termites.”
My bass guitarist Adam said that he had noticed that his wooden floors were creaky as of late, and that there seemed to be musty smell to them. I freaked out and told him “Adam! You need to get inspected right now. They could be eating at your floors as we speak!”
I have learned about the termite warning signs the hard way. If you’ve got floors that sound hollow or squeaky, you might have a termite problem – definitely not music to anyone’s ears. It’s possible that you’ve got dry-wood or subterranean termites.
“Buddy, you need a termite inspector to get in there and possibly save your life,” I told him. Adam immediately found a service for termite inspection in Pasadena, and booked an appointment with them.
Sure enough, they found termites! They had been feasting on his house and Adam didn’t even know. Boy, it would have been a nightmare if his floors collapsed like our stage did!
Did I save his life? Maybe. Did I save him from injury? Probably. Did I save his house being destroyed by termites? Definitely.
I was no angel in my hayday, but I must say that this moment in my life felt quite holy. I’m starting to think that educating people on termites must be an opportunity I’ve been given to restore my karma. How divine!
I don’t mean to brag, but I throw the best parties. My daughter keeps telling me that I’m trying to relive the old glory days and feel young again, but I tell her that I’m just young soul trapped in an old body who can never have too much fun!
I can always count on my best friends to turn on the good times and tear it up. Unfortunately, they also tear up my lawn. Every time we’re finished partying, it looks like a storm passed through and ripped the ground up from underneath! What a nightmare. I have to pay someone to come in every time and fix my lawn after every party because of how bad it looks. It’s been a massive chore to deal with and I’m starting to dread waking up in the morning after to see the damage. It isn’t pretty.
My daughter keeps telling me to stop drinking, dancing, and stomping around with friends at our house, but we all know that I’m not slowing down any time soon. Especially not when I throw the best parties in town – even the paparazzi take note!
I figured that if I wasn’t going to be taking my parties down a notch, that I’d have to take my grass up a notch. Sounds weird, I know. What I mean by that is I needed tougher grass. That’s basically what an artificial lawn is; the look and feel of grass, but tougher and more durable.
I started thinking about how great my life would be if I could preserve the beauty of my backyard with artificial turf. But I still wasn’t entirely sure about it after thinking about it. I had a hard time figuring out if the artificial grass would even look good. After all, I didn’t spend all the time and money on a gorgeous backyard patio and hood just to ruin the scenery with some ugly looking grass!
I pulled out my laptop and typed into Google: artificial grass installation Orange County. I came across NoMow Turf. “Interesting!” I thought to myself. The company name made a good point I hadn’t even thought about before. Artificial turf isn’t just longer lasting, it also doesn’t require time and money to be mowed!
Anyways, right away I see photos on their site. I’m thinking “This is cool. This looks pretty good.” Then I’m thinking “This is pretty impressive.”
I called them and ask for a quote. They were very professional at answering my questions and setting up an appointment.
Once the new lawn was installed, I couldn’t believe how amazing it looked! Even my daughter said, “Dad, you made the right choice. This was a good call.”
The very next weekend we had the gang over to tear it up again. However, this time they didn’t tear up my lawn! For the first time in many parties, my backyard didn’t look like the aftermath of a disaster. Boy, was I relieved! Also, the backyard looks better than ever.
If you’re tired of your beat up old lawn, give NoMow Turf a call and see what they can do for you.
26774 Vista Terrace, Lake Forest, CA 92630, USA
I don’t mean for my ex-wives and ex-girlfriends to be such a big deal on this page. The bad parts of being a rock star aren’t super fun, are they? But hey, you’ve got to accept the bad with the good sometimes. And, when you rock ‘n rolled as hard as I did, you’ve got to expect that I was a pretty busy guy. I played hard and fast with my heart. I don’t regret all of it, you see, I’ve got beautiful kids from it, including my wonderful daughter.
But, I also wasn’t completely out of it, I knew I’d need a pretty badass family law attorney to make sure that my ex-wives didn’t get more than they deserved or take me for all I’ve got. Of course, I wanted to make sure my kids never wanted for anything—and they didn’t! Shuff Law had my back.
At the time, I needed the best family law attorney in Santa Ana. See, with so many of them, it’s hard to know who to go with. So, I did a little digging and talked to a few of my resources. They all said that Shuff Law Firm was the best divorce attorney in Santa Ana. So, I went with them. After my first divorce went smoothly, I knew that they were going to be my go-to attorney in the future.
Now, I never planned on getting a divorce. I wanted them all to work out. But, I’m actually a practical kind of guy and I could tell when splitting up would be for the best, but that keeping in contact with them would be the best thing for my pocketbook and my kids. And they were.
Over the years, I’ve kept in contact with all of my exes to make sure everything was as it’s supposed to be. Shuff helped to make sure my exes didn’t try anything with me, and when they did, they were on top of it before I even had to worry.
Located in Santa Ana, Shuff Law Firm is just a phone call away, even when I am out touring with the band. I know I’m not that special either because they have a 100% response rate on Yelp with a less an hour response time. That’s really good for a divorce attorney that’s in high demand.
Now, my own daughter is having marriage troubles. At first, she kind of laughed when I suggested Shuff Law Firm to her. She said she didn’t want to use the same attorney as her dear ol’ Dad, but I managed to persuade her eventually. I showed her all of the cases that Shuff won for me, and how they were fair to my wives and not just myself. I think that’s what convinced her.
She’s gone off for her consultation, and I know that she’ll be represented by the best. I wouldn’t send my daughter to anyone but the best. She was emotional about the whole ordeal, and Shuff Law are experts at navigating the harsh waters of divorce while remaining compassionate and sensitive to the issues. My hat goes off to them. They’re good people.
Shuff Law Firm
2107 N Broadway #301, Santa Ana, CA 92706
We ended up in San Diego where the band filmed that nostalgic music video last time. San Diego used to be one of our favorite places to go on tour. The fans were great. The food was great. Some of my favorite memories are there. And some memories I may have forgotten about. Well, one such memory came back, and with a vengeance. Not cool, man.
See, being a rock star means having a lot of crazy ex-girlfriends from all over the country (and world). Most of them weren’t serious, and I thought they knew that, but apparently not all of them got the message. One of them heard the news that the guys were back in town, and she sure made sure I knew it.
It was like she waited for the perfect moment to mess with us. At 45 mph, it took bumper cars to a whole new level. Our drummer ended up with some totally not cool whiplash, and I sure didn’t feel great afterward either. Luckily, we knew of a great car accident attorney in San Diego.
We called up Villasenor Law Offices immediately. We already knew they were well known for being a boss personal injury attorney for the San Diego area. Villasenor may have also gotten us out of a scrape or two previously.
After calling them up and explaining the situation, they were immediately at our side. Their first priority was to make sure we received proper medical attention, then they focused on the case. They know what their clients are owed, and they’ll work hard to make sure you have the greatest recovery from any incident.
After I figured out who she was, I told them my theory. They made sure to get eyewitness testimony of the woman swerving around traffic with an obvious intent to hit us and consulted with field experts to verify that it couldn’t have been an accident. Mr. Villasenor over 25 years of experience were clearly on display that day. He covered all of his bases.
It turned out not to be a long, drawn-out legal battle. Villasenor Law Office had their t’s crossed and their i’s dotted. We received what we were owed, and not only that, but I got a restraining order against her. I’ve no idea if she would try something like that again, but if she does, I’ll be protected! I know love can make you do some crazy things, but man, she took the cake.
Our trip to San Diego was otherwise completely uneventful, luckily! We were smart enough to take a taxi for the rest of the time and my drummer got some much-needed rest. I was so glad I had Villasenor saved on my phone that day. You never know when something like that will strike, and when you’re in the moment and stressed, it’s reassuring to know you’ve got someone in your corner, ready to fight for you!
If you are ever in San Diego and need a great attorney, reach out to:
Villasenor Law Offices
12396 World Trade Dr, San Diego, CA 92128
Don’t get me wrong. Retirement is pretty great. Enjoying the other sides of life and putting the focus on relaxation and family has been stellar. I’ve certainly been enjoying it. However, I got to talking with the old band about an original song we wrote back in the day. We always thought it was great, but it never quite fit into any of our previous albums or the times. So, it just kind of got swept to the side.
Now that it was brought up again, we all decided that we needed to record it and shoot a killer music video before one of us kicked the bucket. Almost all of the video would feature us singing in an office building and destroying the place. I’m sure you can imagine the content already.
Well, back in the day we had to search for office furniture for our managers and stuff when we were on tour and for our studio. We worked with this great company, Creative Office Design, who evaluated our space and designed the perfect studio with furniture that fit our exact needs in a cool way. It looked so good, we even would have photoshoots in the corner. It was a great place for creative minds. At the time, we were using brand new stuff. However, for the purposes of this video it didn’t make sense to destroy brand new furniture. It also didn’t make sense to spend the money it would cost for that shiny new furniture.
I spent a little extra time on their website, and this ol’ rockstar figured out that Creative Office Design had an office in Los Angeles and used cubicles and other furniture we could use as well! Looks like they are coming in clutch again. So, I gave them a call and they headed over the next day.
Creative Office Design evaluated our set, and had some great ideas and suggestions for the used cubicles to use in the video. They even found some extra pieces on hand that they thought would really give the music video the aesthetic that the band was looking for. It looked so real, and it was going to look so crazy when we destroyed it.
That first day of shooting, I felt almost guilty when I took a baseball bat to the top of a cubicle. It was genuinely great furniture. But, it wasn’t long before me and the mates really got into it. A highlight of the video was when the Billy, our drummer, used his drumsticks on a glass conference table before throwing a chair into it, shattering the whole thing. Epic. The whole song and production process was a throwback of nostalgia and a throwback of fun.
Once it was over though, my daughter made sure to remind me that I was not allowed to completely go back to the old ways. No more late-night partying. So, me and the boys released the throwback single. It ended up being a huge success. I guess we hit the perfect timing of being old enough to be cool again.
And I still got a little rockstar left in me. I snuck home a chair and desk I knew would look great in my home office.
If you need great office furniture, make sure to check out:
Creative Office Design
5230 Pacific Concourse Dr Suite 105, Los Angeles, CA 90045
Now he understood what his ex-wife was talking about. Ex-wives, he thought. The old rock star stood in his robe on the back porch. He had a small patio back there, but otherwise, it was just a plain, perfectly manicured lawn. A home is a lot more than a show house, or a party house, or even a rocking recording room. He had all of those, of course, in all of his beautiful mansions spread across several properties. But, he felt like they were all missing something.
Holding his steaming coffee close to his chest, he stepped outside and sat down.
Despite being a rock star at heart, and a wandering soul to boot, he’s getting older and he knew it. Staying behind the curtain in his older age meant he was spending more time at home. He knew something that was missing in all of them: a place to sit outside and enjoy the fresh air. To live at the home, not just to sleep. Especially now that he could have grandchildren soon.
He closed his eyes and imagined strumming along to the tempo of the ocean.
One of his favorite homes is in La Jolla, nestled into the rugged coastline of southern California. The rocky cliffs and clear water were refreshing. Whenever he’s there, he just wants to be close to the ocean and quietly play his guitar. Of course, he needs an enjoyable place to sit outside and remain anonymous. The last thing he wanted was some journalist knowing he wanted to sit outside and enjoy the sound of the ocean. It’d kill his rock star vibe. Actually, the more he thought about it, he realized he wanted to revamp all his houses. Why not?
Later that day, he reached out to a friend who got him in touch with a landscaping company. They would come and redo his entire front, back, and side yard. Landscaping in La Jolla was a bit of a challenge, but they were up to it. They incorporated a gorgeous bare brick and outdoor BBQ theme. The BBQ grill was featured as the centerpiece, with a small stage on one side. Beautiful, yet functional. He didn’t know how much cooking he’d get done on the grill, but from his younger days, he knew at least he could make a mean s’mores. La Jolla was home away from home.
The next personal project was a Rancho Santa Fe landscape design. Rancho Santa Fe was where the other famous people go to relax. It was hard to think of himself as famous and a celebrity in that sense. After all, rock ‘n’ roll doesn’t scream caviar, but he couldn’t help but enjoy the perks. There, he had the team design an elegant outdoor setting, complete with a pool and an entertainment system. It’d be a nice place to go swimming and watch movies. The landscape team outdid themselves.
He saved the most complicated home for last: his mansion in San Diego, a high-end landscape project. He wanted to go all out here. The backyard wouldn’t be complete without a swimming pool, grilling and eating area, and a small stage for his own personal rock concerts. You can take the man out of the concert, but you can’t take the concert out of the man.
After the last brick was laid and the final check stroked, he called his daughter.
“Hey hun,” he said. He leaned back in his adirondack chair.
“What’s up?” his daughter asked.
“Nothing much,” he said. “Why don’t you bring the husband over? I got a new pool.”
They did a great job. It was worth it. If you need a good landscaper, be sure to check out:
Torrey Pines Landscape Company
P.O. Box 6742, San Diego, CA 92166
“Tristin, are you still in bed? You need to get up and get ready right now!” Tornado Trixie had entered his room in a swirl, throwing his curtains open. “It’s noon Tristin, NOON! No wonder your marriages haven’t worked out.”
“Ha Ha Trixie,” Tristin muttered sarcastically.
Trixie smiled back at him, “What are little sisters for? Now get up, we need to go meet your divorce mediator. Do you realize the gobs and gobs of money you are going to have to pay if you don’t show up to this meeting? I mean honestly, they might just give everything to her. At least she doesn’t smell like a high school locker room,” Trixie pinched her nose, and fanned her face.
Tristin peeled off his sweaty socks as he sat up, and threw them directly at her head, “I’ll meet you in the car.”
Trixie shrieked and ran out of the room. Five minutes later Tristin joined his little sister in the garage. She was seated in the driver’s side of his new BMW. It was probably good she drove after the night he had. The sped down Ocean Avenue towards the mediator’s office. Tristan had used her before, she saved his ass a ton of money, she is the best divorce mediator in Orange County.
When they pulled in her assistant, Macy, was waiting for them outside, “You’re five minutes late.”
“And you’re paid an obscene amount of money to tolerate me,” Tristin smiled sweetly back.
“Hmm, cute,” Macy replied, “Now let’s go, your ex-wife is here already.” They walked into the building, and minutes later were seated opposite Tristin’s ex-wife, the notorious Tinsley Teagely.
“Tinsley,” Tristin said coolly.
“Tristin,” Tinsley responded. It felt like someone had set the AC to 50 degrees.
“So, let’s get started,” the mediator said, taking immediate control of the situation. “As we all know our clients here have sadly, decided to go their separate ways. While Tristin may have brought in most of the household funds, he feels it is only right that Tinsley is well taken care of after their divorce is finalized.” Tinsley shifted in her chair, she was ready for a fight, but Tristin seemed much more willing to negotiate than she assumed.
They spent a few hours working through all of the belongings and assets. This was the first time they had talked this peacefully in months and both parties were surprised at how easy this process was. Tristin thought he was going to get an earful, and rightfully so given that the marriage is ending because he is an out of control, womanizing party mongrel.”
The mediator smiled and turned to Tinsley, “Look Ms. Teagely, you have been doing an excellent job. You both have. And just think, doing it this way keeps this whole ordeal out of the tabloids. I’m so thankful you didn’t go the traditional litigation route. This would have been made a public spectacle, drawn out for months, and costing you both tens of thousands more.”
“Exactly, and the last thing we need is to be caught up in some pesky, drawn-out public divorce,” Tinsley replied. “I’m just glad we don’t have any kids involved in this. Otherwise, we would need to find a family law firm in Orange County and that would make things so much more complicated.”
Tristin nodded his head in agreement. “You’re right. And didn’t I tell you, she was great? I guess having some experience in this came in handy after all!” Tristin said and then instantly got a glare from Tinsley.
The mediator quickly stepped in, nipping a potential fight in the bud, “How about we take a quick break for lunch, everyone is a little hungry, and you never want to do this on an empty stomach. When we come back we can sign the papers and you guys will be good to go?”
That seemed to please everyone and so they all headed off to grab lunch and would wrap things up a little later in the afternoon.
If you need a good Divorce Mediator be sure to check out:
4590 MacArthur Blvd Suite 500, Newport Beach, CA 92660
Imagine you’re in a band. Yes, as an adult. It started out as an ironic hobby, something you did almost as a joke. But then it started gaining actual traction. You didn’t have to seek out venues anymore…they started seeking you. You’re getting calls, messages from friends you haven’t seen in years, calls from people you would’ve never expected..surprisingly, you’re on your way to becoming a financially successful ensemble. That’s how we started out years ago. Now, we’re back together for a reunion tour.
Everything was going great, but then all of a sudden, the drummer in your band gets a phone call during a rehearsal. He steps outside to take it while you tune your guitar, and comes back in like he’s seen his own ghost. Defeated, he breaks the news.
“My application to extend my time here was denied. I have to go back to Canada in two weeks.”
This is what happened to me only a few days ago. No one knows what to say. The band is nothing without George…his drum solos are the reasons many audience members make second appearances. The band chemistry, the specific and unique talent each member brought to the group…it only worked when everyone was on board. You can’t have the Four Seasons without the fourth man — and no one could replace him.
“No,” the keyboardist pipes up. “That’s not happening.”
For the next twenty minutes, we all dispute what little knowledge we have regarding immigration law. Someone says he’d be an undocumented immigrant if he stays, another says it’s fine if he’s a rock star, someone says he could seek asylum, another says “…from Canada?”….nothing really gets done. That is until we finally decide to use the wealth of information at our fingertips.
“Has no one Googled this yet?” I ask. The band members sheepishly stare at the ground.
After a dejected sigh, I finally put “immigration law orange county” into the search bar. The band members grab their respective devices and do the same. The first fifteen minutes were discouraging, but I realized why so many people go into law (spoiler alert: it’s because they make BANK). The band was making a decent amount of money during the tour, but not that much…money was still very much part of the equation, and it made the search more difficult than expected.
“Wait look at this one,” our keyboardist says. He had found a link to a more affordable lawyer via a Yelp review, and she was local. Not only did she have an impressive amount of positive reviews, but every one of her clients agreed that her services were definitely worth the price. George called the number on the website and she picked up in seconds. After briefly explaining his situation, she assured us that he had several means of legally staying in the US longer. They set up an in-person consultation, and from then on, we were never worried about George having to leave us again.
We only hope more people take the time to find these lawyers, rather than thinking their only options are staying illegally or leaving their entire life behind. These kinds of lawyers often unsung heroes, helping people when they need it most and keeping their prices affordable so people don’t spend their last dime just trying to continue their life in the US. And if that isn’t honorable, I don’t know what is.
Here’s one of these great lawyers:
K Nair law Group, P.C.
31897 Del Obispo St Suite 225, San Juan Capistrano, CA 92675
Termites: the reason your neighbor’s house gets covered in a ridiculous circus tent. No one likes dealing with them, which is why so many people put it off until their ceiling foundation looks a little shakey. But believe me, termite infestations are nothing to put on the backburner. In fact, coming face-to-face with the termite problem early on might just save your life.
I had my own personal run-in with these “delightful” little creatures in my own career. I was halfway through a set with my band the other week, we were doing a little reunion tour, getting the guys all back together sort of thing. So we were in the part in the lineup where the energy really starts to pick up. The skies were blue, the crowd was pumped, and stage safety was the last thing on our minds. However, it became painfully relevant all too quickly when we heard a loud creak in the stage.
I am typically in charge of group morale, so I didn’t acknowledge it as a problem right away. After casting a quick nervous glance to my bandmates, I “played it off” (so to speak) with a laugh and continued in my favorite indulgent guitar solo. But I knew it was a problem I could no longer avoid when the stage literally sunk beneath my feet. I felt like we were on the freaking Titanic!
Call it far-fetched, but there is no other way for me to properly explain this. Whichever beam was supporting the weight of me, our drummer, and our equipment had just given up six inches of its original height. I had no idea this was even possible, at least in terms of physics. It was then that we knew it was an actual problem, not the kind you can just dismiss with “peace, love, and rock n’ roll.”
The rescue mission is my favorite part of the story, and I only know it because my manager told me what happened in full detail after the event. After the unfortunate sinking event, our manager went directly to the guys that saved us last time. Longtime readers of this blog may remember a story where termites took down the stage in our recording studio. Because of that, we had a little experience with termite extermination, my manager literally dug through our old records and somehow, by the grace of God himself, found their number just in time.
A fine exterminator from Garden Grove by the name of Marky Mark (okay not really, but wouldn’t that be amazing??) sauntered in with his knowledge of all things extermination. He had saved us once, we were hoping he could save us again. And just to reset the scene, while all of this is happening, we are still jamming away on stage to a huge crowd. Lord knows how he did the job so quickly — I thought the process involved several days-worth of fumigating and quarantining, but apparently, it is doable without such drastic measures. Within what seemed like minutes (one’s sense of time is severely compromised whilst on stage), the problem had evaporated into thin air. The concert continued, the crowd was pumped, and we completed the set on a termite-free stage,
Now I know this sounds far-fetched — termite extermination within a few hours? That’s too science-fiction-y for my taste. But folks, the advances of technology go way beyond SpaceX and self-driving Ubers. The future is now guys, it’s pretty dang cool. And in tribute, I’m writing a new song dedicated to this amazing man who has now saved us twice. Be on the lookout for that! Until then, keep rocking!
Shoutout to my guys at:
Natural Science Exterminating
11642 Knott Ave, Garden Grove, CA 92841
Beep, beep, beep… Snake Robins rolled over in his bed and smacked his alarm clock. The clock read 5:15, not AM but PM. Hmm, he thought, I must have slept all day again. He really needed to get better about setting his alarm clock correctly. Oh well, he thought.
He had a dinner meeting with his friend Rob Reynolds in 45 minutes. He threw some clothes on and headed out the door. The restaurant was walking distance from his old house, so he strolled down the sidewalk in its general direction. His friend Rob was actually working on building his new home, that’s how they had met.
Snake’s fame had revamped within the past year after millennial celebrity Justin Boston had released a cover of his famous 70s song, “I Just Want to Rock”. All of the sudden his music was cool again. He went from being a washed up 70s rocker to a modern-day celebrity. On top of that he had made a pretty penny. So, it was time to ditch his old, run-down bachelor pad. The years of partying had not been kind to it anyways. Snake was moving on to something better, and that’s where Rob came into play. He was known for building some of the nicest houses in the city.
Snake entered the restaurant and saw Rob was already there. “I would complain about you being late but I wouldn’t expect anything different,” Rob said with a grin. Snake noticed it appeared he had already ordered because there were no menus on the table. “I was getting hungry, so I ordered for both of us, I hope you like burgers.”
A waitress approached holding a tray with two plates just as Snake was taking his seat.
“Two ultra deluxe burgers with extra sauce,” she set the plates down in front of the guys.
“We’ve had too many meals together,” Snake said laughing and putting his hands up in surrender. It was nice to have a friend that knew him so well, Snake thought.
‘I thought you might be hungry after a big night,” Rob said smiling.
“How do you know I had a big night?” Snake replied, to which Rob just raised his eyebrows. “Okay fine, thanks,” Snake laughed. “So, what do you need from me?”
“I’d like you to review these plans and sign on the dotted line,” Rob said. He slid a folder and a pen across the table to Snake.
“Woah, I’m going to have a pool, cool!” Snake exclaimed.
Rob rolled his eyes, “Haha, Yeah, we’ve been over this, you are going to have a killer home! If everything looks good, you can sign there at the bottom and I can get started actually building your dream home.”
“This all looks righteous man,” Snake replied, signing his name at the bottom of the document.
“Great, now that I’m your new agent…” Rob replied taking the paperwork back.
“New agent?” Snake asked.
“Ya, you just signed papers giving me 30% royalties on your hits,” Rob replied.
Snakes face reddened, “what are you talking about?” He was pretty confident Rob was joking, but in his world he couldn’t be sure.
“Just kidding!” Rob started laughing hysterically. “Didn’t anyone ever teach you to read everything before you sign?”
Snake punched him in the shoulder and replied, “Let’s start
“Well, let me highlight some of my favorite features. In the basement, you are going to have a full-fledged recording studio with soundproof walls so that you don’t disturb the neighbors. You already saw the pool, and we’re going to put in some fountains that spray into it. O, and, there’s a secret room in the library! Like something straight out of a movie. Pull the right book and a door opens up to a little wet bar where you can host private parties.” Rob could tell Snake was pleased with the ideas and was excited to get the job started.
“Rob, what can I say, you work magic, I cannot wait to get into my new home.” Snake said as he was finishing devouring the burger. Snake went home thinking to himself, “I am sure lucky I met Rob and his team, this new house is going to be killer!”
Sailhouse Custom Homes
170 Newport Center Dr Suite 220, Newport Beach, CA 92660